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Writer's pictureArie Monroe

I never thought I would say this but...



At the Age of 39, about to be 40, I am HAPPY to be single.


No kids, no boyfriends, no chaos really in my life, like it use to be.


I am honestly happy.


Not saying I never want to be in a relationship, because it would be nice, but I just never been more satisfied than right now. I cant believe I use to obsess over being with anyone to be honest.


I had come across some thing called the MGTOW (men going their own way) movement. Men choosing to just be single and do everything they are interested in and not get married or be in fully committed relationships. Many guys making this choice because some girls stomped on their heart and mistreated them and left them high and dry with the burden of things like paying child support (or alimony if they were married.)


Guys claiming all women are the same and they just want to take their money and use them up. Saying the women are self centered and think there private parts are made of gold when they could get sex pretty much any where.


I saw a few videos where guys were subjected to a woman who literally kept all her bills paid and food in her belly, by just going on multiple dates with guys that would happily open there wallets for the chance to be with her. The girl was usually blonde, pretty, tall, and thin. And her aspiration in life was to be a model and expected to always get her way especially with guys. Well, I say, if you are upset with how things turned out, then maybe you shouldn't have fallen for someone like that in the first place.


Thing is, people are people no matter how you look at it. Male or female doesn't matter. There are plenty of jerks out there just as ready and willing to take advantage of the next cute-ish girl gushing over their muscles. They will do things like, give backhanded comments calling them stupid or fat, to their face, and expecting them to buy them gifts and pay for the dates just as quickly as a woman might do to a guy.


Heck I had plenty of experience with this myself. I can give multiple examples. Not to mention, the person would lead with, "we aren't dating, i don't want a relationship," or "we are just friends," but they had the nerve to have all these high expectations like we were in a relationship.


For instance, after dating one guy when I was really young, (18 and he was 25) for over a year. Not only did he refuse to be in a relationship with me, he would introduce me to other women that he would tell me was his girlfriend. Same person told me to be his girlfriend I had to do certain things. One of those things included buying him a $200 pair of Jordans, as soon as, they came out so he could be the first to own them. Then he would be my boyfriend. All while saying I love you. ( Don't worry, didn't buy the Jordans, i was a broke college student.)


Another person I was just hanging out with, just a friend. I wasn't actually interested in a relationship. We would go out to bars and restaurant for fun and when we got there he would order a shit load of alcohol while I was just drinking water then say hey lets split the bill. The bill would be like $60 and I only spent $15. Unfortunately At the time I was recovering from the death of my mom and a lot of bad shit in my life, so I kept letting it slide for a while, until finally I just stopped talking to him. He just faded out my life like he never existed in the first place.


All this to say, S**ty people are just SH**ty. One of the things I had to learn was a lot of the BS I put up with, I did so out of wanting to be accepted or loved. Just wanting someone to like me for me! But in order for that to happen the person has to be willing to put in the effort to get to know you and it seems to me that most people in our society just don't have time, nor, do hey want to make the effort.


And lets not get me started on the guys i meet that smile in my face, but secretly dislike me because they are intimidated by my ability artistically. For some reason they see it as a personal attack on their ego, but they want to be around you just in case you might be able to help them with something or you might know someone that will help them further there own ambitions.


GUYS ARE JUST AS CATTY AS ANY FEMALE MIGHT BE, THEY JUST HIDE IT BETTER.


But, I was writing about happiness and being single.


Well it seems like there is no better time in life than now, to be honest, to focus on the things I enjoy. I don't have to have anyone's permission to do anything or try to dumb myself down so that the person I am with doesn't feel like less of a person. For the first time in my life i don't have some individual putting me down on a daily bases in order to make them feel better about themselves or refusing to be in a relationship with me cause I just don't fit some weird mold they have in there mind.


Some of these same crappy people that are looking at you like you are the one with the problem, live in there parents basements, don't have jobs, and spend their entire day playing video games while they wait for someone to take care of them and cater to their needs, but they tell you, you are not the one, you aren't good enough. Every time you go out with them, you have to pay for everything, but they only want to go if its a place they are interested in going.


I might as well take myself to a movie and eat a crap load of popcorn and Reeses by myself!! I'll actually see a movie I want to see and have a good time. Then I don't have to look forward to a bad make-out session afterwards. Ick! Or worse, one of those awkward hugs where the person sticks there butt out really far as if you are really gross to touch, you know the hug.


When the right person comes along he won't just pretend to like me long enough to get me to trust him, then walk away when he gets bored. I don't have to play nice because I am trying not to be rude or trying to gain their admiration. Let them earn my affection.


Reminds me of the time a guy told me I played too hard to get. Sorry I don't enjoy you putting your hands all over me when I have barely known you for 2 weeks.


Seriously, I just want to be treated like a human being and not a meal ticket or worse, a series of open holes. So there ya go MGTOW guys. Be a good person and only go around good people. The rest will fall into place. Don't be women haters, be haters of SH**ty people instead.


In the mean time, just do you Boo.

 

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